Watch Closely

     No news is good news.  Maybe.  I wouldn't know because this household hasn't received a daily newspaper for many days.  

     We did get two over the weekend because a very sweet lady who delivers another daily paper in this small community decided she could do it for them on the weekends.  Then she told me she has been getting her newspaper every day.  Hmmmm......me thinks I've been put on the 'bad' list for quitting.  Time will tell, I sent the editor an email this morning.

     So, I know nothing of the happenings of the world.  I wonder if that is a good thing?  I do hear a snippet or two of news on the radio, most of which is unpleasant.  It is unfortunate that bad things sell more news than good.  Unless, of course, it's sex.  Sex sells just about anything.  

     Yesterday I had to take Ms. Sassafrass to the doctor's office while her mother was en route from a history final.  As we sat in the waiting room, Sassafrass watched the big screen TV that was tuned into a cartoon network.  Every so often, she would tell me something I missed, so I began to watch it with her.  I don't know the name of the cartoon, but the main characters were cows.  

     I'm not a farmer or rancher, but I do know the difference between a cow and a bull, so from here on I shall be using the term 'cow' loosely.

     One of the cows was a cow, female.  That was obvious by her sexy eyes with long lashes and possibly a ponytail.  It was also obvious because she had a huge udder on the lower abdomen.   I'm not kidding, it looked like a toilet plunger on steroids.

     This cow's friend, another cow, was supposed to be a boy.  By this time my daughter had arrived.  I asked her about this cartoon and she assured me this cow was a boy.  "OK", I said, "Then why does he have an udder too?"  Yep, there it was, just as big as the other's udder.  She hadn't noticed it.  

     Seriously?!?  These udders protruding like large and in charge pink plungers were hard to miss.  They even swayed back and forth as the cows walked, bipedal of course, after all talking cows need to be as human as possible.  

     Perhaps the persons responsible for the structure of the cows never stepped foot on a farm.  Perhaps they were trying to send some kind of hidden message, a conspiracy theory of cow parts.  Maybe they thought it was a good idea, rather than to put the actual bull parts on.........Oh, I'd love to say something about that, but shall choose not to.

     I guess my question is why was it necessary to put gender body parts on at all?  Did they think no one would notice?  Perhaps that's the message.