The chariot, aka the little black truck, has been under the weather.
We have been in this new place 15 weeks and have spent 13 of those under the hood of afore mentioned chariot.
The little black truck did not understand there were things I wanted to see while I was here. Things like Stone Mountain. I had seen it when I was fifteen years old and even though I'm sure it has not changed, I wanted to see it again. Then I wanted to see the Georgia Guidestones. There is a really weird story that goes with these stones and they are referred to as the American Stonehenge. No one knows for sure who had them made or their exact purpose, They are engraved in eight different languages and have a set of 10 guides, or commandments, written on them. But, the little black truck was not in the mood for sightseeing.
I believe I was more for moral support than actually being of any great service, as I watched my husband toiling under the hood. I also believe I could now take a distributor out, apart and put it back together as many times as I have watched this feat of mechanical wizardry being done. The most aggravating thing about it was the fact that he got it to run, but it would only run once. After that, we were back to "square one" trying to figure out the problem.
One lucky weekend, it decided to run for more than one day. We had found a shop that would work on it, so with me behind the wheel of the little black truck and my husband following in his work vehicle, we set out on a journey of about three miles. As we were zooming along in two lanes of fast moving traffic, the little black truck decided it had had enough and when it decides that, it gives no warning, it just dies. It also decided to do this just as I was entering an intersection where the light had turned green. If you have never driven in the Atlanta, GA area traffic, there is one golden rule never to break and that would be the "don't break down in traffic" rule. Folks are always in a hurry and this was a Sunday afternoon and suddenly, I was not helping them get to where they needed to be.
My husband would pull up as close as possible, jump out of his vehicle and give me a push because we could see a place to pull off the road. It was just up ahead, not too far, maybe half of a country town block. It looked to me like it was a mile away and if I failed to mention this, I was pushing too. Yessirree, I was pushing and trying to steer a powerless vehicle with no power steering. This scenario repeated itself about four times and just before we got to the place to get off the road, I heard someone holler at my husband, "Hey! Ya'll need some help?" To which he replied, with a smile, "No, we're just trying to get it off the road."
I was such a hot, sweaty, heaving mess, I didn't even have the strength to argue about it. I figure it's a guy thing, it ranks right up there with asking for directions.
Tuesday, March 28, 2017
Tuesday, March 21, 2017
Active Wear LOL!
The south eastern part of the USA is sure full of health conscious people. Everywhere I go, folks are all dressed up in active wear. They wear their workout, running, walking and whatever else attire to the grocery store, outlet mall, bank and even to the park, where they are actually using it for its predetermined function.
I enjoy looking at these outfits. Some are very sleek and flattering. Some of them are very colorful and even come with matching shoes. Gone are the days of the original baggy sweat pants since everyone seems to have bought into the idea that Spandex is king. I figure if they are comfortable, that is all that matters. Since I do not own any active wear and I'm one of those people who likes to get up, get dressed and then do whatever else the day calls for, I just wear my street clothes, blue jeans and a shirt, to the park. On the days that the weather is a bit cool, I don an extra large red hooded sweatshirt, that my husband received as a gag gift, that reads on the front, in huge letters, "HERE FOR THE BEER" and go along my merry way. Folks are nice here and everyone smiles when I meet them on the path.
Living in a large metropolis is so much different than a village of 1200 souls. In the village, it is possible to go to the Post Office and not see anyone. In the city, there are people everywhere and people watching can be a fun and interesting experience. In internet and texting jargon, LOL means 'laughing out loud'. When we arrived in this area north of Atlanta, Georgia, the letters took on new meaning. I believed I had been cast into the Land of Leggings. If the people do not have on active wear, they have on leggings. Maybe I did not pay attention before, but I sure do not remember seeing so many of them in N.C. It seems that leggings' original intent were to be worn with a top that was long enough to cover the derriere portion of the human body. If that was actually legging etiquette, it has long been forgotten. I shan't even go into detail about some of the leggings faux pas I have encountered. I just have to believe they forgot to check out the full length mirror before they left the house. Maybe they are just so comfy, folks forget they have them on when they head out the door. One thing is for sure, they are for any age and any size and it's not my place to judge what folks wear. I just leave mine in the closet.
I enjoy looking at these outfits. Some are very sleek and flattering. Some of them are very colorful and even come with matching shoes. Gone are the days of the original baggy sweat pants since everyone seems to have bought into the idea that Spandex is king. I figure if they are comfortable, that is all that matters. Since I do not own any active wear and I'm one of those people who likes to get up, get dressed and then do whatever else the day calls for, I just wear my street clothes, blue jeans and a shirt, to the park. On the days that the weather is a bit cool, I don an extra large red hooded sweatshirt, that my husband received as a gag gift, that reads on the front, in huge letters, "HERE FOR THE BEER" and go along my merry way. Folks are nice here and everyone smiles when I meet them on the path.
Living in a large metropolis is so much different than a village of 1200 souls. In the village, it is possible to go to the Post Office and not see anyone. In the city, there are people everywhere and people watching can be a fun and interesting experience. In internet and texting jargon, LOL means 'laughing out loud'. When we arrived in this area north of Atlanta, Georgia, the letters took on new meaning. I believed I had been cast into the Land of Leggings. If the people do not have on active wear, they have on leggings. Maybe I did not pay attention before, but I sure do not remember seeing so many of them in N.C. It seems that leggings' original intent were to be worn with a top that was long enough to cover the derriere portion of the human body. If that was actually legging etiquette, it has long been forgotten. I shan't even go into detail about some of the leggings faux pas I have encountered. I just have to believe they forgot to check out the full length mirror before they left the house. Maybe they are just so comfy, folks forget they have them on when they head out the door. One thing is for sure, they are for any age and any size and it's not my place to judge what folks wear. I just leave mine in the closet.
Tuesday, March 14, 2017
Listen Up
Some people may find this hard to believe, but not everyone is on, or has access to the internet. There are actually folks out there who are clueless about the goings on, on the world wide web (www). Makes the rest of us wonder just how they survive.
For those who do not partake of the on-line status, let me try and explain, in simple words, what the rest of the world is doing. First, the internet is something you find on a computer, or nowadays, a cell phone. When someone taps into the internet, they are able to find information on any subject the human mind can fathom. Kind of like the biggest library in the whole world.
To narrow the search for information, people use a search engine. No, this is not like the engine in a car, it's more like the index in a book. For instance, if one wants to make apple pie, they would look for the dessert section of the cookbook instead of flipping through the pages until they found apple pie. By that time, they would be out of the mood to make one.
The top dog of search engines is called Google. Google was created by a couple of guys while they were in college, back in the late 90's. The following is what Google can do: if one were to type "apple pie recipe" into the Google search engine and press the enter key, within a blink of an eye, 0.68 seconds to be exact, nearly 6 million apple pie recipes are in front of the searcher. Google also has maps that can give directions to everywhere in this country, and beyond. If one puts their address into a Google search, it will not only show how to get there, but what the property looks like. Ever seen one of those Google cars riding around? They are used to make and update the maps. Google is not just huge, it's mahonkin' big.
Today, if a person does not want to go shopping, they can get on-line, type in Amazon and have more items to choose from than thought imaginable. Amazon started out selling books, but now, if a person gets tired from reading six million apple pie recipes, they can order an apple pie on Amazon and have it delivered right to their door. Amazon even has a gadget that sits in a person's house and if someone doesn't want to get off the couch to reach their phone, to look up some information, they can just ask out loud and the gadget will answer them in a nice human like voice.
Moving right along with my internet tutorial, there are things on-line called social media sites. These are places where people gather together to show what they had for breakfast, lunch and dinner, where they are eating above stated meals and post things they would never say out loud. The behemoth of the social media sites is Facebook. Their goal is to make sure everyone on the planet has internet, although their last attempt to put up a satellite did not go too well, but that is another story. Facebook has an age limit for its parishioners, of 18, but no one pays any attention to that and then is mad because someone else's kid posted something nasty about their own.
These things are just the basics of driving along the information highway and I hope it was clear enough to understand because this is what happens when we "surf" the net (aka get on the www.):
A person gets on Google and looks for an apple pie recipe. The next time they are on Facebook, an apple pie recipe will show up in the advertising section along the side of the page and also an ad from Amazon, for the pre-made pie............... to the people behind these big name internet ideas, it's all about marketing and money....or is it? When I first figured this out, it was a little disconcerting, it was as if I had been followed or spied upon.
What if there is more to it than that? Who else is privy to the information gathered via the internet? I listened to a man who tries to educate people about how dangerous it is to put all the things a person does during the day on line for everyone to see. He said that the older generation listened and took note of these dangers. Sadly, the younger ones had the mindset of "the all seeing eye already knows where they are and what they are doing, what difference does it make?" I don't know how everyone feels about that, but to me, it is scary.
I will finish with a true story that was recently shared with me. A young woman was telling a co-worker that she thought she was being followed or bugged. She went on to say that every time she and her boyfriend would talk about things, those 'things' would show up on her Facebook page and Google searches. She had not looked these things up on-line, she had merely talked about them, out loud.
She has one of those gadgets in her home, the one that will answer any question when asked out loud. It listens all the time.
For those who do not partake of the on-line status, let me try and explain, in simple words, what the rest of the world is doing. First, the internet is something you find on a computer, or nowadays, a cell phone. When someone taps into the internet, they are able to find information on any subject the human mind can fathom. Kind of like the biggest library in the whole world.
To narrow the search for information, people use a search engine. No, this is not like the engine in a car, it's more like the index in a book. For instance, if one wants to make apple pie, they would look for the dessert section of the cookbook instead of flipping through the pages until they found apple pie. By that time, they would be out of the mood to make one.
The top dog of search engines is called Google. Google was created by a couple of guys while they were in college, back in the late 90's. The following is what Google can do: if one were to type "apple pie recipe" into the Google search engine and press the enter key, within a blink of an eye, 0.68 seconds to be exact, nearly 6 million apple pie recipes are in front of the searcher. Google also has maps that can give directions to everywhere in this country, and beyond. If one puts their address into a Google search, it will not only show how to get there, but what the property looks like. Ever seen one of those Google cars riding around? They are used to make and update the maps. Google is not just huge, it's mahonkin' big.
Today, if a person does not want to go shopping, they can get on-line, type in Amazon and have more items to choose from than thought imaginable. Amazon started out selling books, but now, if a person gets tired from reading six million apple pie recipes, they can order an apple pie on Amazon and have it delivered right to their door. Amazon even has a gadget that sits in a person's house and if someone doesn't want to get off the couch to reach their phone, to look up some information, they can just ask out loud and the gadget will answer them in a nice human like voice.
Moving right along with my internet tutorial, there are things on-line called social media sites. These are places where people gather together to show what they had for breakfast, lunch and dinner, where they are eating above stated meals and post things they would never say out loud. The behemoth of the social media sites is Facebook. Their goal is to make sure everyone on the planet has internet, although their last attempt to put up a satellite did not go too well, but that is another story. Facebook has an age limit for its parishioners, of 18, but no one pays any attention to that and then is mad because someone else's kid posted something nasty about their own.
These things are just the basics of driving along the information highway and I hope it was clear enough to understand because this is what happens when we "surf" the net (aka get on the www.):
A person gets on Google and looks for an apple pie recipe. The next time they are on Facebook, an apple pie recipe will show up in the advertising section along the side of the page and also an ad from Amazon, for the pre-made pie............... to the people behind these big name internet ideas, it's all about marketing and money....or is it? When I first figured this out, it was a little disconcerting, it was as if I had been followed or spied upon.
What if there is more to it than that? Who else is privy to the information gathered via the internet? I listened to a man who tries to educate people about how dangerous it is to put all the things a person does during the day on line for everyone to see. He said that the older generation listened and took note of these dangers. Sadly, the younger ones had the mindset of "the all seeing eye already knows where they are and what they are doing, what difference does it make?" I don't know how everyone feels about that, but to me, it is scary.
I will finish with a true story that was recently shared with me. A young woman was telling a co-worker that she thought she was being followed or bugged. She went on to say that every time she and her boyfriend would talk about things, those 'things' would show up on her Facebook page and Google searches. She had not looked these things up on-line, she had merely talked about them, out loud.
She has one of those gadgets in her home, the one that will answer any question when asked out loud. It listens all the time.
Monday, March 6, 2017
Late Night Wonders
Welcome to late night wonders. Wonders in the shape and form of the dreaded infomercial. You know the ones, just waiting for the next victim. The next victim of a sleepless night.
Let's take a look at some of the best of the late night infomercial products. Those wonderful wonders we could not live without.
Oh! Remember the Snuggie? That long robe like garment that morphed into a blanket. Just the thing to keep warm on those freezing nights when you don't want to turn the thermostat up. Even if you wanted to turn it up, by the time you got unwound from the Snuggie, you were too hot and too tired to care.
Then there were the Moon Shoes. The kids really needed a pair of those! For at least 30 minutes or so. Or until they realized they really were not walking on the moon.
This next one definitely gets a thumbs up. The Forearm Forklift!
This amazing strap lets two people feel like they have super powers when it comes to moving furniture or other heavy objects. I have seen this one in action as I watched two young men pack a washer and dryer set, together, up two flights of stairs and into an apartment. Yes-sirree, you can't go wrong with the Forearm Forklift....(two young strapping men not included)
Now, let's surf through the channels and see what else is waiting to eagerly empty our pocketbooks. What is this? A late night infomercial featuring the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie. What on earth?!? Are they talking fifty shades? It says it is for women only....what could it be? Let's turn up the volume and find out!
The Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie is a first of its kind, for women only, machine that does the tossing and turning for you! Just about every woman on the planet, over 50, knows it is nearly impossible to get a good night's sleep. We can drop like a lead shot when we hit the bed and three hours later, there we are, wide awake. What is a woman to do, besides get up and watch late night infomercials? The Wackadoodle BR Rotisserie has the answer! Rather than get up or lay in bed, tossing and turning, let the Wackadoodle do the work for you. Simply put yourself in the full length body clamp, cushioned with six inches of memory foam (top and bottom!) and after making sure your face is snugly in the face cutout, push a button on the handy dandy remote control and PRESTO! the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie locks you into padded comfort. Three hours later, when your eyelids fly open, simply push one of the preset tumbles on the remote. There are three programs to choose from and each one lets you set the pace. First is the back and forth motion. This feature lets you get almost into a full rollover before it takes you back in the opposite direction. Second, and much like the first, is the intermittent back and forth. This feature lets you stay in either the top or bottom position of a near rollover for 10-20 seconds before it tumbles your body back the other direction. The third feature is the full rollover and can be programmed to go in either direction and at what ever speed you prefer. The Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie also comes with an arms and legs in or arms and legs out feature depending on how great the need to flail these extremities. The Deluxe Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie comes with two revolving fans, located at the head and feet position for those nights when you begin to wonder if you remembered to dry off after your shower. During the day, the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie folds down and is completely hidden or, can be left up and used for a towel rack. The folks at Wackadoodle are so wacked out, they offer a no money back guarantee for as long as you own your Wackadoodle BRR.
BUT WAIT! Does your husband thinks he is sleeping with the clothes dryer?!?......if you order in the next 1 1/2 hours, Wackadoodle will throw in a FREE Wackadoodle husband shield! This full length body shield keeps the hubby safe during the full extremity flail mode and promises he will not miss a beat of snoring. Order now, they are going out the door like hotcakes!
While supplies last, each Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie comes with a free "I'm a Wackdoodle" tee shirt so your friends will know for sure that you are a Wackadoodle.
Mine should be here in about 6 weeks.
Let's take a look at some of the best of the late night infomercial products. Those wonderful wonders we could not live without.
Oh! Remember the Snuggie? That long robe like garment that morphed into a blanket. Just the thing to keep warm on those freezing nights when you don't want to turn the thermostat up. Even if you wanted to turn it up, by the time you got unwound from the Snuggie, you were too hot and too tired to care.
Then there were the Moon Shoes. The kids really needed a pair of those! For at least 30 minutes or so. Or until they realized they really were not walking on the moon.
This next one definitely gets a thumbs up. The Forearm Forklift!
This amazing strap lets two people feel like they have super powers when it comes to moving furniture or other heavy objects. I have seen this one in action as I watched two young men pack a washer and dryer set, together, up two flights of stairs and into an apartment. Yes-sirree, you can't go wrong with the Forearm Forklift....(two young strapping men not included)
Now, let's surf through the channels and see what else is waiting to eagerly empty our pocketbooks. What is this? A late night infomercial featuring the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie. What on earth?!? Are they talking fifty shades? It says it is for women only....what could it be? Let's turn up the volume and find out!
The Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie is a first of its kind, for women only, machine that does the tossing and turning for you! Just about every woman on the planet, over 50, knows it is nearly impossible to get a good night's sleep. We can drop like a lead shot when we hit the bed and three hours later, there we are, wide awake. What is a woman to do, besides get up and watch late night infomercials? The Wackadoodle BR Rotisserie has the answer! Rather than get up or lay in bed, tossing and turning, let the Wackadoodle do the work for you. Simply put yourself in the full length body clamp, cushioned with six inches of memory foam (top and bottom!) and after making sure your face is snugly in the face cutout, push a button on the handy dandy remote control and PRESTO! the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie locks you into padded comfort. Three hours later, when your eyelids fly open, simply push one of the preset tumbles on the remote. There are three programs to choose from and each one lets you set the pace. First is the back and forth motion. This feature lets you get almost into a full rollover before it takes you back in the opposite direction. Second, and much like the first, is the intermittent back and forth. This feature lets you stay in either the top or bottom position of a near rollover for 10-20 seconds before it tumbles your body back the other direction. The third feature is the full rollover and can be programmed to go in either direction and at what ever speed you prefer. The Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie also comes with an arms and legs in or arms and legs out feature depending on how great the need to flail these extremities. The Deluxe Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie comes with two revolving fans, located at the head and feet position for those nights when you begin to wonder if you remembered to dry off after your shower. During the day, the Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie folds down and is completely hidden or, can be left up and used for a towel rack. The folks at Wackadoodle are so wacked out, they offer a no money back guarantee for as long as you own your Wackadoodle BRR.
BUT WAIT! Does your husband thinks he is sleeping with the clothes dryer?!?......if you order in the next 1 1/2 hours, Wackadoodle will throw in a FREE Wackadoodle husband shield! This full length body shield keeps the hubby safe during the full extremity flail mode and promises he will not miss a beat of snoring. Order now, they are going out the door like hotcakes!
While supplies last, each Wackadoodle Bedroom Rotisserie comes with a free "I'm a Wackdoodle" tee shirt so your friends will know for sure that you are a Wackadoodle.
Mine should be here in about 6 weeks.
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