Friday, February 20, 2015

Don't Ask

     We all do it.  We meet someone, on the street, in the grocery store, where ever and we say, "Hey! How are you?"  When we do this we never expect, nor usually want, the truth.  Just a casual, "I'm fine." will suffice.

     Not so with me today.  If you don't want to know, please, do not ask.  I feel like crapola and am willing to shovel it in great loads upon the waiting ear.

     It all started Thanksgiving day.  This past Thanksgiving.....last year.  I was getting ready for the day's activities and while I was hurrying around I turned just a certain way and caught the ring and middle finger of my left hand on a cabinet.  This was not a huge motion, but when it happened it shot a pain into my left shoulder that felt like it had been wrenched from the socket.  The damned thing still hurts.  

     About a week before I did that, I had picked up a laundry basket full of dirty clothes and headed down the hallway to the laundry chute.  This lovely household action pulled something in my back and hip on the left side and the damned thing still hurts.

     "Mother, why don't you go to the doctor?"

     I just give them my best blank look.  As if I didn't understand what they said.  Because I do not want to go to the doctor is the best answer I can come up with.  I do not have the time and I abhor sitting idly, waiting, reading magazines that are six months old and full of advice that is now no longer useful.

     Then, there is this dog.  This dog who refuses to learn where and when to potty.  I know he knows, he knows he knows, because when he casually uses the kitchen floor, or the living room floor, or the hall way floor in front of me, he quickly trots off to the safety of his kennel.  He stays there until the coast is clear and then resumes his happy life.

     So last night I decided to tackle all the spots, or the worst ones, and I crawled around on my hands and knees with a bucket of cleaning solution and many rags.  I tried to keep most of the pressure situated to the right side of my body, taking it easy on the opposite shoulder and hip.  That was not a good idea.  I woke this morning with pretty much the entire left side of my body unusable and in pain and it makes me mucho snarko.

     I shall relent.  I shall call the chiropractor.  This particular doctor uses acupuncture.  Good, they can stick them in my eyeballs if that will help. 

     Oh, I nearly forgot......How are you?

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