21 Days

     Eva Marie had lived at the West Row apartments for nearly ten years.  She had moved there shortly after her husband had passed away.  Even though she was 80 years old when she first arrived at 400 West Row Street, she chose a second floor apartment furthest from the stairs.  

     Eva Marie had her own reasons for choosing apartment #210 and the first one was for the view.  She could see the entire grounds for West  Row, it's small park like setting to the north and the entrance from the street.  The covered terrace that protruded from the front of the building provided a front porch balcony experience, as she liked to call it.    With apartment #210 being located at the end of the building, the end of the terrace was all hers.  There was enough room for her plants and her beloved porch swing.  She also like to use the stairs, it kept her young and she considered them a good form of exercise.

     Another thing Eva Marie liked about West Row was its mixed population.  The tenants ages ranged from 2 to 90.  She could have easily afforded to live in a retirement village, full of all sorts of amenities for the elderly, but she had no desire to be around a bunch of fuddy duds, nor did she consider herself in that category.

     Every morning, Eva Marie would go out the door and walk past the other apartments towards the stairs.  Most mornings during the week, she would get the opportunity to greet some of her neighbors who were on their way to work.  She would go down the stairs and walk to the front entrance where the rows of locked mailboxes were located.  After she retrieved her morning paper, she would take the path through the small park like area then head back to her humble abode.  With a fresh cup of hot tea, she would sit on the porch swing, catch up on the daily news and watch the comings and goings of 400 West Row.

     Eva Marie had seen many tenants come and go through out the years.  Her newest next door neighbors, Jake and Gail, had been there about six months, moving in right after they were married.  When they first arrived, there was much 'love in the air', as Eva Marie would put it, but lately things seemed to be going south.

     The walls at 400 West Row were not the thickest and Eva Marie could hear the arguments, late at night, that usually ended up with a slamming door followed a few seconds later by screeching tires as Jake exited the parking lot.  The fighting didn't sound like it was physical, just a lot of yelling.

     One morning, while Eva Marie sipped her tea, she could hear another argument brewing and Jake came flying out the door, his face as red as a beet.  He glanced Eva Marie's way, his face reddening even more, grumbled a "Morning Eva" and stormed down the terrace to the stairs.  By the time he reached his car, Gail ran out the door to the railing on the terrace, her face covered in tears.  She was going to say something to Jake, but it was too late, the car door slammed shut and then he was gone.

     Gail turned to go back into her apartment and her eyes widened when she saw Eva Marie sitting on the porch swing.  Eva had strategically placed the newspaper in front of her face, but Gail knew she had been there long enough to have witnessed the mornings' mess.

     Gail managed a weak "Good morning Eva Marie."

     "Good morning to you Gail."

     "Sorry." Gail sniffled.

     Eva Marie put down her paper, "No need to be sorry, Gail.  May I offer you a nice cup of tea?" 

     Gail wasn't sure what it was about this old lady, maybe she reminded her of her own grandmother, but she didn't hesitate on the offer.  "Sure, yes, thank-you.", she answered.

     "Well, have a seat on the swing, Dear, and I'll fetch you a cup."  Eva Marie said as she opened the screen door.  When she returned with a steaming cup of orange pekoe and a box of tissues,  Gail was sitting on the swing with her long legs tucked underneath her.  

     Eva Marie smiled as she held out her offering of liquid and paper and Gail managed a smile and gladly took both items.  Eva Marie was never one to beat around the bush, she grabbed her own cup, set down next to Gail and asked, "What's the problem, Gail?"

     Gail sipped her tea, and tried hard to hold back another round of tears, but it didn't work.  "I don't know", she cried, "All we seem to do is fight!"

     Eva Marie waited while Gail blew her nose and regained some of her composure before she spoke.  "Gail, would you like to know my secret to a long and happy marriage?"  

     "Yes.", Gail answered.  "Because I don't think ours is going to be long.....it certainly isn't happy anymore."

     "My Dear", Eva Marie started, "Marriage is like a grape vine.  It starts out small and vulnerable, but as it begins to grow it discovers that in order to keep growing up, it has to anchor itself to something.  Say it's growing by a fence and as it grows it sends out small tendrils that wrap around the wire.  The only reason it does this is to simply hang on.  Sometimes the winds blow something fierce, but that one little tendril will keep it tethered and let it keep growing.  When it gets a little bigger, it comes to another wire and once again, it will wrap yet another small tendril around it for added strength.  It may branch off in different directions once in a while, but it's main focus is to make a strong foundation to hold it in place as it continues on its journey."

     Gail looked at Eva Marie and said "I understand the analogy Eva Marie, but it doesn't seem like much of a secret."

     Eva Marie laughed and said, "Oh, that's not the secret part!  The secret is something you can do, during those times when it seems the only thing to do, is hang on.  The secret is the 21 day plan."

     Gail raised an eyebrow at Eva Marie, "Ok, I'll bite.  What's the 21 day plan?"

     "When you hit a rough windy spot in your marriage, that is when to incorporate this plan.  It's a very simple concept and requires no lengthy instructions to have to memorize.  Just when you think you can't stand to look at the other half of your marriage, you pull out the secret weapon.  For twenty one days straight, you can only say something nice to your spouse."

     "That's it?  That's the secret?" Gail thought she should have just gone back inside and done some more crying.

     "Yes, dear, that's it."  Eva Marie took a long sip of her tea.  "It doesn't sound like much, but it could be the hardest, most rewarding thing you could ever do.  Kind words can have the greatest healing effect, but, when you're mad as hell, they are the hardest thing to get out of your mouth."

     "I don't think I could think of anything kind to say to Jake." 

     "It doesn't have to be much to start out with", Eva Marie went on, "Sometimes it can be a simple 'nice shirt' because that's easy to say between clenched teeth."

     Gail grinned although she didn't think something that simple was going to fix something that seemed un-fixable.

     "Now, that's just the first part of the secret."

     "I thought you said this was a simple concept."  Gail mused at her elderly neighbor.

     "Oh, it is. But the other part of the secret is, if you can't say something nice for 21 days in a row, you have to start over.

     "Start over?"  Gail gasped, "You're kidding me!"

     "Not at all.  If you have been able to do it for ten days and then call him a moron on day eleven, you have to start over, at day one."  Eva Marie smiled and then continued.  "You see, Gail, when the tendril on the grape vine is doing it's job, trying to hang on, nobody really notices how hard its working.  It's the same when trying to say something nice to someone for 21 days.  It will go unnoticed for a while, but after a few days, something magical begins to happen.  They start listening and it makes them feel good, better than they felt before and just like the old verse 'we reap what we sow', the kind words will begin to come back to you."

     "It sounds too simple.", sighed Gail.

     "Well, just give it a try.  Surely your marriage is worth 21 days."

     Gail finished her tea, thanked Eva Marie for the advice and walked back to her apartment.

     The first trial run of the 21 day plan didn't work too well, but Eva Marie was pleased that at least Gail was giving it a try.  The quarrels were getting few and far between.  By the end of the third attempt, the slamming door had ceased trying to get knocked off its hinges.

     One morning as Eva Marie set perched in her swing, reading the paper and sipping her tea, Jake came out the door for work and Gail was right behind him.  Jake turned back to Gail, took her in his arms and kissed her deeply.  As he headed down the terrace, Gail looked over at Eva Marie, winked and said, "Just call me a grapevine."

     Eva Marie returned the wink, "Hang on tight, my dear, hang on tight."