Many moons ago, when I was in school, I learned something. It wasn't the usual things we go to school to learn like reading, writing and the dreaded math class. It was a lesson, that once I learned it, I never forgot it. I didn't necessarily take heed of the lesson at all times, but I knew the consequence of not paying attention to it.
The lesson was this: If I got in trouble in school, I was in much bigger trouble when I got home.
I think most teachers today would agree that this is not the norm anymore. It seems to be the exact opposite. If a child gets in trouble at school today, the teacher gets to experience an angry parent with an attitude of their child does no wrong.
Children are our most precious commodity. They are far more valuable than silver or gold. They are a gift to be cared for. They need to be loved and cherished. They need to be given boundaries. They need a routine and consistency. They need to be praised and encouraged to believe in big dreams and ideas.
Children are not things to be placed high on a pedestal or to be paraded around like a trophy because you did something special by giving birth. They are not better than any other children. Some may have more talent or more learning abilities or come from different levels of prosperity, but that doesn't make them better than anyone else.
They are not pets, like puppies or kittens. I've seen people pay more attention to their pets than their kids and sadly I've seen parents discipline their pets more than their kids.
Children were not given to you to be the center of your universe. They are given to be shaped and molded into the very best they can be. If you place them in a more important level than your spouse, you could be making a very big mistake. Our children are only with us for a very short time, sometimes it feels like 'a blink of an eye'. If you have spent nearly twenty years giving your undivided attention to only your children, you may find out when the empty nest syndrome hits, that your spouse has found another interest......and it isn't you.
If you are a single parent, and there are so many, don't make the same mistake. You have a life and need to show your children that you are important too. I read a statement the other day and it was the truest advice I have ever heard about raising children in one simple sentence....The best thing you can teach your child is how to live without you.
As parents, we simply cannot run around behind our children all their lives, making things right. We can't fight their battles and we can't always keep them out of harms way. Life happens.
It's probably a safe bet to say that there are prisons full of people that needed to be told "No" and a child that has been given no discipline is an empty shell. Children need discipline as much as love. They need to learn the difference between right and wrong, and when they do something wrong, to understand there will be consequences to experience.
I'm not advocating beating the snot out of them, but if all you do is yell, that is all they learn. If you give empty threats, children learn very quickly that you're "blowing smoke". When they learn you are in fact lying, then you have taught them to lie. If you let them watch crapola on television, then that is what they learn. If you curse at them and call them names, then don't be upset when they get in trouble at school for doing the same.
Opinions are like um........noses, everybody's got one and these are mine, it's just the truth as I see it.
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