I knew this would happen. Writer's block, that thing that happens when your head is suddenly empty, no new ideas and the harder I try, the blanker I get. The only thing I could come up with was global warming. Who the hell wants to hear about that? It's been hashed up and down so much it's old news. Besides, if the experts took into consideration the baby boomers, they'd have their answer. Think about it, 80 million people hitting their 50's, say half of them are women. So now there are 40 million women hitting the menopause stage of their life having hot flashes...good grief, it's a no-brainer.
I shoot my proof reader a text. After all, it was her idea I do this in the first place. She is my cheerleader, my source of encouragement and she has an incredible spontaneous sense of humor so I figure she can come up with something. "I need help", I tell her. Since she is driving to work she calls me, smart girl, no texting while driving. She says, "How about writers block? Or boobs, everybody likes boobs. Water towers, that one just popped in my head. Exercise and singing." I jot all these down and we say our 'goodbyes'.
Looking at the list I'm thinking she wasn't much help. Then it dawned on me that maybe she was on to something. OK, already covered the first one, so what about boobs. Boobs made me think of Miley Cyrus. As I typed in her name I spelled 'circus', that pretty much sums her up. I had thought about writing her an open letter about some of her recent antics, but since she doesn't take advice from the pros who have been down that stardom road, I figured she wouldn't listen to me either. As far as boobs go, she has the money and the means to keep hers looking cute and perky. I wonder if cute and perky boobs at age 80 are still an asset?
Water towers? Our old water tower always reminded me of the Tin Man on the Wizard of Oz, at least his head. The new one really put us on the map of coming out of the stone age. It was much larger than the 'tin man' and its white color gleamed like a beacon. A pair of Peregrine falcons made their nest on the new tower until their space was taken over by numerous antennas needing good reception. The tower now looks like a giant pin cushion, but the falcons moved into my neighbors' tree and they raised a brood of five this year. Watching them was great fun.
Exercise is one of the biggest money makers out there. I could have probably gone on an Alaskan cruise with what I've spent on exercise programs. The promise of steel buns and no bat wing arms was just too appealing. If I get up off of my not-so steel butt, walk into the other room and dust them off, that should burn a calorie or two.
Lastly there is singing. I do love to sing. I don't know that anyone else loves to hear me sing, but I can entertain myself to no end when the radio is on. I like to make up songs to the tune of some other song, for people on their birthdays. I have a couple of requests so maybe I will just go work on them and quit fighting the writer's block.
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